their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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