just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
