There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
