How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
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my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize