I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
vagina is talking i cant
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
