Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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