He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
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He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I can't turn off my feet"
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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