We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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