This house was built for laser tag.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Randomize