let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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