Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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