Me too!
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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