it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Holy shit dude........stairs
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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