Just mADE A PArabola og urine
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
