After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
