the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
