Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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