Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize
