i permit you to call me
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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