i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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