Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Randomize