No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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