I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
