Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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