yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
