Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
