I am puke
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
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