i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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