If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Randomize
