I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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