Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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