i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize