Can i not drive my cunt home
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize