you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
