watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
