he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
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