Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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