ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
