Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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