i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
