Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
