i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Randomize
