he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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