Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
