508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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