her vagine was all disorganized.
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Congratulations! We have a period
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