White coat. Heels.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Send help, water and tortillas.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Randomize
