Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
