Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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