he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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